Musings and Snoozes

One breaks my body and the other breaks my soul

on September 13, 2014


Emotional wreck pretty much sums up this week. Up and down and back again about a hundred times over. I’m not going to write about it all because when I write in detail I just relive the whole bloody lot, so in short, this week:

The Good

Getting promoted. That’s pretty good. Unexpected too. Despite some of the quite frankly bloody amazing things I found out at the party the previous week, I was starting to get a bit disillusioned that I might have to be more patient than I’d like at work. But no, turns out I’ve made enough of an impression to warrant an unexpected promotion and needless to say, pride levels went through the roof.

•The pretty damn amazing people in my life. That’s not meant to be sappy, I’m just bloody lucky that in every aspect of my life I have amazing people-husband, friends, family, colleagues. They get me out of bed in a morning (or early afternoon in the case of today…oops).

•Re-falling in love with Ryan Adams. I feel 15 again and no I don’t care.

The Bad

Restlessness beyond belief. I can’t settle, I can’t concentrate, I can’t shut my mind up. This does not make for sleeping, productiveness or even being able to control my opinions at work. Not ideal.

•The realisation that my new and odd symptoms I’ve been experiencing have been going on so long that they’re neither new nor odd anymore. Therefore they need mentioning at the hospital. Tingling limbs is becoming numbness and falling over, queasiness is becoming nausea, aches are becoming stabbing pains and the odd dizzy spell is becoming full on world spinning. Ugh.

Essentially I’m just a bit all over the place and I’m not good at feeling like this. I’ve been on such a level track over the last few months that I’ve forgotten how to cope with being quite this out of control. I know it will pass and the good bits keep me going, but really, I’d like to just calm down and be normal for a while now!


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