Musings and Snoozes

Things are looking up lizard

on August 12, 2015

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Where to start…. As usual, when things are going well I tend to forget to blog. And things are going pretty well. Not always easy, but well.

So first things first – the gluten free diet is still going strong, I’m missing virtually nothing (I’ve even stopped dreaming about warm white baguettes) and most importantly I’m feeling much better from a pain perspective. I’m sure it’s not all completely gluten related, I’m sure some of it is merely eating healthier in general as it’s considerably harder to nip to tesco for shit in the evening, but whatever it is, I love it 🙂

I’ve finally got back to the gym and I’m thoroughly enjoying it. It took a lot of work to motivate myself to go sign up (more about that later), but now I’ve done it I’m going 2-3 times a week and I’m really starting to feel (and see) the benefits. There have been some comedy moments, like my pathetically weak muscles when doing resistance exercises, but it’s getting easier with every session.

I’m in a pretty good place at work. My current role is coming to an end, which I’m pretty ready for now (if US UK relations are still in tact by Sept, it’ll be a miracle), and I’ve got a new project to get my teeth into full time come October. It’ll be challenging, but fun I hope, not to mention that it will include a trip or two to Ireland which is a nice bonus. My health is still something I’m aware of when it comes to work, but it is by no means a barrier to getting what I want 🙂

And finally, I have a bloody amazing pain therapist at the moment who is helping me address things that I really already knew, but didn’t know how to deal with. Some of it is practical – pacing, setting goals, being realistic about what I do, and some of it is delving into things that I’ve never been able to talk about before. Addressing my anxiety and my headspace has been…. hard, but something that I’ve probably needed to do for a long time. I don’t think I really realised quite how much of an issue anxiety has been for me over the last few years. If you’d have asked, I’d have said I was fine, but in reality it’s been slowly stopping me from doing the simplest things. And actually it’s been a relief to even acknowledge it, let alone talk about it. Bear in mind that I was first referred for counselling when I was 17 and it never materialised and I’m now 28. I’ve got quite a lot to catch up on it seems.

So there we go, it feels pretty good to be able to say things are not just ok at the moment, but actually good. For the most part nothing has gone away or disappeared, I’m just learning new ways to deal with all things lupus and life related 🙂

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