Musings and Snoozes

You can do anything, but not everything 

on December 26, 2016

I think it’s safe to say that I’ve been a bit rubbish at keeping in touch and seeing friends this year. I’ve struggled hard with balance, with looking after myself vs doing too much, with wanting to hide away a little. Plus the practicalities of being a smidge broke half the time. 
I want to fix it, to change this year, but I’m bright enough to know that I’m not suddenly going to recover and find boundless energy. If anything, with studying for my Masters, it’s going to get worse not bette, but I want to try and manage my time and my energy more wisely at least. 

So that’s part of my aim from now. And it does start now. I don’t want to say from new year, because that gives me too much leeway to screw it up in the next few days and start 2017 in a bad way, which is the worst thing I could do. 

And so with that in mind, I am currently resting in the spare room at Jon’s parents. I know I’ve hit the limit of my energy now and need to just lie down, let the fatigue do its worst for a bit, and rest my aching body. Doing this, instead of driving up to see friends tonight, was a good idea, and it means the time I will get to spend with them tomorrow will be so much more valuable after the rest. It’s a hard one for me to accept, and probably hard too for many of my friends who may feel like I’m putting them off or not making enough of an effort. 

But I know I have to focus on the positives and I also know that contrary to all my doubts and anxiety, my friends are my friends for a reason, and part of that is they care about me. So while I realistically know that I’m not going to get to do everything I want to or see everyone as much as I’d like, if I can make it work just a little bit better then the precious time I do have will be so much the better for it. 

And so that’s what I’m doing, starting now. A very Merry Boxing Day to you all, from a very restful pooch and I. 

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2 responses to “You can do anything, but not everything 

  1. Firstly you have not been rubbish. You are one of my friends that work hard to catch up with others. You are inevitably the driving force keeping us in contact. This is especially impressive considering you have more battles than most.
    And if your friends are worth their salt, they’ll know it’s not about not making an effort they simply don’t see it that way, besides they love you anyways. Despite your perpetual lateness (although you were early for our last meet up, go you!) and aptitude for nagging. We love you for you, with all that entails and maybe because of all it entails. You are a good friend, always there no matter what. I for one am pleased you realise you need to do a little bit of you first and try not to be all things to all people. As a friend we’ll either be patient (not me) or come fester with you as you look after you (now this is me!). I applaud an insight thats long overdue and remind you of this blog when I need to. Much love lady x

  2. EllenL says:

    I like to think my perpetual lateness is endearing, right? But thank you lady, you are undoubtedly one of the reasons I do look after myself as much as I do (we call it nagging yes?), and it’s much appreciated x

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