Musings and Snoozes

Reset, readjust, restart, refocus

on December 16, 2018

Every now and again it’s nice to come and get lost in the city. So many people and not a single one gives a damn about who you are, what you do with your life, or who you love. It’s incredibly restorative in a way I never realise I need until I’m here.

Christmas is always harder than I admit. It’s one of my favourite times of the year and the excitement I still feel at 31 is much the same as it was when I was 5 years old. I don’t ever want to lose that. But inevitably, being an adult, particularly one with some mental health challenges, makes it a little different. The feeling of being pulled in a million different directions, of trying to fit everything in before the big day, of not feeling like I have any time to just sit and breathe and be. Throw in being an introvert and a thoroughly disorganised one at that, and really, it’s a recipe for disaster.

But I will always make it work. Despite this being the busiest weekend of the month for me, I’ve still managed to find a couple of hours to sit with a coffee, my thoughts, and my music to just reset. Even better that I’m in Central London as I do this – no one knows me, no one cares who I am, what I’m doing, or what I’ve got going on in my life. My headphones are shutting out the world, Dessa is reminding me how complicated life can be, but how I can navigate it and process in my own way.

At the bottom of my coffee cup, I’ll be ready to go back out into the world. But for now, I’ll be here, quietly resetting.

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